The Next Chapter Begins

Today begins a new chapter. And I'm feeling really good about it. The air is a little cooler. My coffee tastes richer. My heart feels more hopeful. And my "Love Force" of family and friends has, once again, overwhelmed me with their support.

They've given me this chain of blessings with links to open for each of my 35 days of radiation therapy. It's like the chain you made in elementary school, counting down the days before Christmas or the beginning of summer.

Chain of Blessings

In heart formation :)

I LOVE IT SO MUCH! Today's link (Day 1) had super-special messages from my husband Tad, my brother Richard and my BFF Jamie. Guys, your messages brought tears of joy! I feel so lifted and blessed. I'll be feeling your love and God's presence when I go for my first treatment at 1:30pm today.

I'm not scared or anxious really. I feel better and more focused than I have in several days. I'm having to ramp up my anti-seizure meds (not because of anything new; I was on too low of a dosage) and the side effects came on strong. "Irritable" doesn't even begin to describe my mood last week. More like "weepy outbursts in the middle of daycare drop-off" or "intense urge to throw wine glass against patio railing when gnat flies in it".

Last week I was a mess. I tell you this so you know I'm not always up. But I have to welcome the hard days to have an appreciation for the easy and fun. And to remind me that God is in control -- no matter what.

For those who are wondering what my course of treatment will be, we prayerfully decided on the standard for my case: 6-7 weeks of radiation followed by adjuvant chemotherapy five days a month for 12 months. Hopkins was the only place that encouraged more aggressive treatment. But current research doesn't exist to compel us toward that more toxic regimen.

So here goes. Day 1 of this new chapter is off to a good start.

Much love,
Kim

Sydney, 5 months
 

Super smiley